Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Changing colors

Another visit today with my doctor. He is cutting back on the chemo pills to see if it will straighten me out some. GOD only knows how much I would love to get past this. Anyway all else looks good and I praise the LORD for that. Just wanted you to know. I'll be out of email for a few days again but this time to go and paint where the trees are turning colors and I may also turn colors..hhaha. Praying all is well with you guys.

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Truth or Consequences

The air is cool and crisp as it blows across my face. I can't seem to inhale enough of it. It must be my eagerness this early morning to take in all of God's creation....I've always been this way when I feel blessed just to be on this planet and to know what I have come to know as truth. All truth, if practiced, has its consequences. It will either minister to you or against you.
What is your truth and do you take time to contemplate its affect on you and others in your environment? Are you still searching for that truth that some have definitely found and others wish they had? An age old question: How can a black and white cow eat green grass and give us white milk and yellow butter?
The truth is that some things may never get answered to our satisfaction and may jade us to other truths.
I say all these things because I had a friend die recently and the question on his lips was..."Why me?" "What have I done to deserve dying like this?" He had never found the truth of life nor its author.
He was jealous of my truth because of the calm, peace and hope it gives me daily over the decades. But I tried to share my truth with him and he just couldn't receive it as his truth. Life issues can be so illusive and demanding....WHY? you might ask. Because the truth lives in the infinite and we are trying to capture its essence with a finite mind. We must search out and take time to practice a truth and in its proof to us, it is truth, we can decide to willfully submit to it for our benefit or not submit. Consequences either way. But don't wait, like my friend, until time has run its course. Think about it..

Soli Deo Gloria

Monday, September 21, 2009


Hey Gang!
Thanks for all the comments and checking to see where I'm at.....I'm ok..sort of. I've been having some side effect issues with this new chemo but I take my last dose of it tonight and then I have a 7 day interrupt before I go on it again for 14 days.
The doctor and I have had a few conversations this past week over my problems. He's had to stop and start me off and on and take other medicine for the diarrhea and cramping etc..
Sorry I haven't been on the computer to communicate but it's taken all my time to take care of me....hahahaha . I'm a high maintenance individual right now.
God is good though and this is just a little hiccup in the game of life.
I pray all of you have been well and let me know how I can send positive vibes your direction along with a prayer, if you don't mind.
Please keep check on me once in a while....just to make sure I haven't run off to join the circus.
I miss doing my art the most right now.....but soon.
God bless

Tuesday, September 8, 2009

Sept 8th, 2009

Well what a day so far! I've been to the Chemo doctor and this was the day he has started me on some chemo pills called Xeloda.
Now the best thing about this is no needle for three days straight. The pills will last 14 days straight (8 each day) and 7 days off and start them again. I really don't know the side effects of this regimen yet but I will keep you updated.
Doc had another tough thing to say and that was....If this doesn't work I don't have anything else for you. Now that's a statement!
I've always believed this to be GOD healed or it would never be and number 2, there comes a time to 'cut bait or fish'. So this is no surprise and my prayers have been to be healed and to be taken off this chemo. My prayer is being answered one way or another. GOD IS GOOD TO ME.
To me this is an exciting time and I get to participate in it. Many of you have similar or worse circumstances. Faith in God is what I rest my day in. My prayers go out to you and please send some up for me. Get out those journals and write or doodle.

Wednesday, September 2, 2009

"You are faking it..."

I was accused the other day of faking it. The accusation was..."Every time we ask how you are you say, I'm doing well." Then they went on to inform me I had to be fibbing.
This made me think back to when I was a kid and my Grandma would call me into the house from playing. Grandma would say..."Now get on in there boy and wash everything that shows." hahha I can hear her now. Anyway this statement made me think of faking a bath or anything we do in life and putting on a show for all to see. BUT, let's examine this for a minute.
We all have our beliefs we live with and die with and some may not understand mine or yours. You all know that I am a christian and in the book of James it states, "A double minded person is unstable in all his ways". So instead of just washing what shows, or faking it by telling people I am doing well and lying to them.....I really confess and believe in my mind I am doing well. My body just hasn't caught up with my beliefs/mind.
Everyone knows that the body is led by the mind/head. If I were to say I am well one time and then change 5 minutes later I would appear unstable or double-minded as in the book of James. This does not mean I am in denial of pain etc. BUT I speak more of what's well with me than what isn't. The more my mind hears my positive speech/belief the more it will inform my body of how it should be. A type of reprogramming.
Now I know some of you are going WOW, he is out there today. Trust me when I say that I have practiced this for decades and know for a fact that this works in my behalf more than the alternative of wishy washy language. Wanting to be well but moaning and restating to everyone all your aches and pains does nothing but produces more aches and pains. You talk yourself into miserableness...the mind is leading the body in how it should be. This takes some learning and time to practice and become who you are. So washing what only shows is ok some of the times but we really need that 100% bath, all over, to be totally clean and feeling good. This bath is the quality of thoughts and the renewing of how you think. Call it self talk or selling yourself on how you want to be.
Take your thoughts and drive a standard in the ground and don't waver for nothing. In 2 Corinthians 5:7, it tells the christian to walk by faith and not by sight. My faith is in God and what HE has done and is doing for me. This is by belief and I get my thoughts renewed to this along with my speech. Mys speech is such as, how well I look and getting stronger day by day etc.. If others are going to talk about you let them repeat the positive things that you locked and loaded their lips with. I don't see myself sick even though I have pain etc.. I have a healthy of picture of myself in my head and the thinking/thoughts that go with it. Dwell on these things and not the negative. YOU are making a choice. THINK ABOUT IT! God bless..LOL